All The Scars You Give Me
by Rondomness
Summary: When the thing he dreads most happens, how much are Kaname willing to sacrifice to keep her who means most safe?


**All The Scars You Give Me by Rondomness**

**Rating:** M

**Summary: **When the thing he dreads most happens, how much are Kaname willing to sacrifice to keep her who means most safe?

**Warnings: **Angst, non-con pedophilia, black mailing, child abuse etc. Very harsh, so don't read unless you can handle those things…

**Spoilers:** For my other fanfictions The Spider's Web and Tears of Blood, but not anything canon.

**Pairings:** Ichiou x Kaname and implied future Kaname x Yuki.

**A/N: **I DO NOT IN ANY WAY RESPECT OR CONDONE ABUSE IN ANY FORM, ESPECIALLY NOT CHILD ABUSE! It's a horrible, horrible thing. In my main fanfictions, Tears of Blood and Crimson Depts, the rapes are of course also terrible things to do to another living being and it leaves scars, but… it is still even more horrible to leave such scars on a child, also if said child is more of a very young adult than an actual child. Kaname, in this fanfiction, is around sixteen.

I'm writing this to get a perspective to the things happening in ToB right now. That is also the reason for it's horrible delay. It is for the readers to understand several important parts. What coursed Kaname to take the risk and leave Ichiou's house for good. What the culmination of several years of abuse is like. And what happened when Ichiou found out about Yuki.

It's written for Sagakure too, because I know how you adore Ichiou x Kaname non-con. Hope you like it 8D

And pretty much also to fill in the empty space when Kaname remarks in chapter 8 of Tears of Blood something about pleasuring Ichiou. Even though I have no idea if anyone but myself noticed xD

**Disclaimer:** This fanfic is for entertainment purposes only; no money is being made from it. The characters are made by Matsuri Hino. I do NOT own Vampire Knight nor any of the things mentioned in here.

Kaname's body was going into overdrive as he stood in front of Ichiou's office table, fighting to control his own responses. He was worried sick with knowing what might happen next. But… at the same time, he had no idea what he could possibly have done to cause Ichiou's wrath, a wrath so great that he'd been summoned. He hadn't done any escapes the last two months actually, which was a lot longer than his usual time between tries. He was quite ashamed to admit that perhaps, just perhaps of course, he was a little scared of the old noble. He was scared of getting attacked once again. The soft but still unpleasant scent of artificial blood and tobacco hung in the air.

Ichiou preferred real blood far over artificial, but because of Kaname's presence in the house, it was better when seen in a purely political light for him to go along with the young pureblood's pacifism and drink artificial. Although it tasted horribly, sated much less than real blood and in every way was worse than the true kind, it spared humans or lower levels of vampires from providing it. That was why Kaname's parents many years ago had determined that it was good for the co-existence movement, and Kaname had inherited their ideology.

Therefore, it was politically wise of Ichiou to play along although he hated it. Yet another thing that Kaname _purposely_ had meant just to annoy him. Actually, it was just before Ichiou meant that Kaname's very existence was done purposely to annoy him. Although… it would be unproductive if he died.

As much as Ichiou despised Kaname, it was a rather pleasant thing that he continued to live on and in that way provided a never drying out source of pure vampire blood. He was like a mussel. Once opened, he consisted of the finest pearl inside. However, Ichiou had already spent several years appointed with this task and he hadn't found the right tool to use yet. However, that might change now.

"Why did you call me?" Ichiou looked up from a map containing papers and photos from what Kaname could see. The noble looked uninterested, as if he had just noticed the pureblood's presence. He observed. Kaname knew he was monitoring the boy carefully, waiting for any signs of his distress. Once the sign that he was losing the grip on his own self-control was given, Ichiou would make progress into the next step.

However, this time was different. Ichiou cut straight to the point without all of his usual smalltalk. "I have something I want to ask you out about," he stated calmly and threw the map in which he'd been looking towards the boy. "Sit," he commanded and nodded towards the chair on the opposite side of the office table.

Kaname sat down, but didn't look into the papers placed in front of him. He still had some sort of dignity left even after eight years in this cage. When noticing Kaname had frozen and refused to look through the map, Ichiou learned a little forward and nodded towards the map to encourage Kaname into looking.

"Do you know this girl?" the noble asked, opened the map in a rush and exposed a picture of a young, thirteen-year old girl with brown, shoulder length hair and big, brown eyes. A girl Kaname knew all too well. His heart skipped at least a dozen beats inside his body and his hands got wrapped into tight fists around the chair. Yuki.

"No," Kaname said, clearly hearing how shocked and frightened he sounded. His voice was not as stoical and composed as he would have liked, far from it. He was afraid that Ichiou read him like an open book right now. Afraid his facial expression might give away his feelings for this girl.

Kaname couldn't understand how this could even happen. And why did it have to happen? For eight years, he'd struggled, he'd suffered, sacrificed and endured only for her sake. Was everything he'd done now suddenly meant to be in vain?

"And the name, Cross Yuki, says you nothing?" Ichiou asked in fake believe, clearly knowing that Kaname was lying. The pureblood was cornered up like an animal against a wall. Ichiou quite obviously had found out, some way or another, and that was too late to be restored. Kaname couldn't do anything to avoid exposing his chest to whatever Ichiou wanted to get out of this. _But… if that bastard wants my blood… I'm going to kill him… no matter the consequences. No matter if it will throw Yuki into a dangerous position. _

It would be better for Yuki even if it would put her in the danger zone. Because once the peace had been restored, Kaname would be able to stand by her side without having to fear for her safety at all times. And… if Ichiou ever tasted his blood, he would most certainly get both stronger and more powerful than Kaname currently had the strength to stand up to while protecting Yuki.

"No," he repeated with iron will, but Ichiou had seen the small tremble of his hand. The noble went around his table with exaggerated slow movements and learned closer until his face was mere inches from Kaname's. The pureblood continued to look directly down upon his own hands to avoid meeting Ichiou's eyes, but a hand turned his face upwards to meet the boy's ruby gaze.

Those steel eyes seemed to be almost glowing from excitement over the way Kaname was utterly trapped now. He was cornered, caught completely with no way of escaping the ambush Ichiou had laid for him. It was a complete checkmate. Kaname's couldn't move any of his pieces.

"I think, after all, you _do _know this girl. It is her that you always rush out to meet, right?" the noble asked, victory and utter malice in his voice now. This was pure, sadistic glee. Kaname remembered the last time that look had come into the noble's eyes. When Takuma, by mistake, called him Kaname without an honorific, Ichiou had guessed that they had become much closer. Kaname was nine years old at the time.

Ichiou'd asked for his blood, or rather demanded to get it. If not, he threatened with beating Takuma as well. Looking back, Kaname knew that the noble never would have done it, but at that point, he hadn't been there for long and hadn't known Ichiou very well. He was a child and he'd believed what the older man had said. He'd been terrified, but had refused either way.

Ichiou let go of the dead grip he'd had on the pureblood's jaw and simply waited for Kaname to make a statement or at least respond to the question. When no response came, Ichiou let his hand touch Kaname's shoulder lightly, as a warning.

Kaname froze, not moving a muscle. He'd learned that that was the only way to avoid further punishment without humiliating himself. He was stiff, even as he could feel his guardian's hot breath at the back of his neck. His eyes found a small paperknife, used for letters, on the table and considered how much it would take to get it. If he was fast, he could reach it and turn around before the noble would have time to figure out what was happening. But he didn't try, because that would be the completely sure method for obtaining a death sentence for both Yuki and Cross, together with a massive beating and Ichiou would probably use it as another argument to make Kaname look like an unstable pureblood, who had to be monitored carefully.

However, sitting still was not an easy task when he knew that Ichiou used his silence to justify punishment. Especially not when Kaname knew what Ichiou would consider _proper punishment_ in this state of mind. Ichiou had spent the last two days or so observing Kaname with _that_ look. That look meant that Ichiou was in the mood and that was never a good thing. He enjoyed hitting Kaname, but with that, he could wait until he found something to justify it. It was different when he was in the mood. Then, he monitored the pureblood carefully, much more than usual, and was there nothing anyway, he just pulled him into the office, claiming that he had done something wrong and punishing harder if Kaname asked what.

When their eyes met for a few seconds, lust was readable in Ichiou's face, making it harder and harder for Kaname to hold his blank face. "Kaname… Understand me right. I don't want any harm to come to your little bird. It doesn't have to end that way." The noble's voice sounded sincere and compassionate enough, but for Kaname, it was obvious that he was faking his concern. "I mean… you're a good boy, aren't you?" he asked while cupping one of Kaname's cheeks, clearly laying up to something. The younger pureblood just looked up at him dispassionately. "I've told you all along that we have to be able to trust each other, right? If you're being an obedient boy, I'll treat you well. And since you're almost all grown up now, I'm pretty sure you're mature enough to see what I mean by obedient." When Kaname gave a short nod, Ichiou continued. "Good. Come here then."

The pureblood expected that Ichiou would move in behind him and start touching as usual when he was in the mood, but this time, he took his hand instead. In mortified terror, Kaname watched as Ichiou guided his hand lower before finally placing it over his groin. "No!" the pureblood screamed and rejected the hand violently, beginning to shake instantly. It felt _wrong_ to touch the old noble in such a place. "Kaname," Ichiou mumbled, already quite obviously aroused. "You know what happens when you're not behaving. What you did for me before, it's no longer enough. Now… Be a good boy and show me your hand."

Kaname hesitated for a few seconds, before deciding that Yuki was more important to him than his own body. Slowly, he raised his hand and spread his fingers slightly. "Good boy," Ichiou whispered as he guided Kaname's hand down again. The pureblood could literally feel how aroused he was. Nausea tugged at his senses instantly. He tried to block it from his mind, but he weren't really successful.

Desperate, he tried to get away again, tried to remove his hand and move away, but Ichiou's suddenly iron-strong hand held him mostly in place. Purely physical, Kaname was far below the noble's level. Kaname was 16, with a slender built and he weighted around 40 kilo. Asato was, in body, around 45, with a fit, muscular body and he weighted close to 85.

A deathly silence hung in the air for a moment, the only sound being Kaname's fight for air in his state of near-panic. When Ichiou felt Kaname resisting him, he sighed slowly. "If you're being a sweet boy… I'll let her off the hook. But don't fight me. Understand, Kaname, I decide what'll happen, so if you please me and do well, I can do as you wish. If you're not… I can get her killed faster than you can get to her front door when you escape. Would you like that?" Kaname didn't answer.

"Would you like that?" he repeated, this time a bit rougher in his tone. Kaname slowly shook his head.

Ichiou waited until Kaname stopped struggling and looked down to the ground in, what the noble saw as, submission. Then, he pulled the boy closer, learned over him and supported his head on Kaname's shoulder, which was easy enough considering they almost had the same height.

Then, in one long motion, he pushed Kaname's hand up against his groin, letting out a long, satisfied groan. Kaname turned his head away and suffocated his urge to gag. Ichiou's hand guided Kaname's fingers, and even though he hadn't even unzipped, the pureblood could feel him hardening more and more with every movement. He kept pushing the boy's hand up and down and moaned and gasped into his ear, while making sure he positioned his mouth so all the air leaving him would hit Kaname's biting area.

The pureblood had nauseous feelings non-stop during the ten minutes the noble took to finish. When it finally happened, he was holding Kaname so tightly that the pureblood had lost the feeling in the entire arm that Ichiou was holding. He hadn't said anything though, just wanting for Ichiou to finish quickly so he could get out of here.

Ichiou let him use the small toilet longer down the hallway when he got conscious enough after his wild rush to see how sick the pureblood looked. Kaname's entire body shook like a leaf while he splashed his face with cold water and washed his hands for at least five minutes to try and make the feeling ease away. He made some half-hearted attempts at throwing up to make the nauseous feeling fade.

Then, his eyes found his own, worried reflection, desperately struggling to stop trembling. He breathed deeply a couple of times, calming his mind down. Despite his horrible mental condition, he couldn't afford to look this weak in front of anyone, especially not Ichiou. And he couldn't afford to not demand that Yuki stayed safe.

Right now, he just wanted to go back to his room, collapse on the bed and cry himself to sleep behind locked doors, but Ichiou had told him to get back to the office as soon as he finished going to the toilet. Kaname was too frightened right now to disobey.

When he stepped back in, Ichiou was sitting comfortably behind his desk, still clearly in a good mood but not overly aroused anymore. He sat like he always did and except for the look on his face, it seemed like nothing had happened. He was just checking through the rapport again.

"Sit," he demanded for the second time that day, not looking up at the pureblood, while he did as requested. Finally, he brought his eyes to Kaname's face and smiled. "You're almost an adult, aren't you, Kaname? Then, you must be able to behave like an adult and play adult games." Ichiou spoke in a tone resembling one you might use when speaking to a five-year-old. When no response came, he continued. "I don't think it's a good idea that you tell anyone about our small games, Kaname. You've tried to cast away my guardianship so many times that it is beginning to look bad on your health card. You know that there are… _some_… people who would be delighted to lock you up, right?"

Ichiou sighed when Kaname again refused to give a proper response. Suddenly, he got annoyed that the pureblood was just sitting there, all mute and stiff, watching him. Anyway, he calmed his mind. He planned on making Kaname see the hopeless situation he was forced into, and that plan would be ruined if he couldn't contain his lust to hit the boy.

"I think it was very clever of you to be a sweet boy today. I'm sure we'll find something out. Remember, you can always come to me and I'll help you as good as I can. I'll treat you very kindly, Kaname. Of course only as long as you're being a sweet boy," Ichiou purred, looking for signs of Kaname's façade crumbling.

"I want you to leave her alone," Kaname suddenly mumbled, as if completely untouched by what he'd just done and just picking up the conversation they had before. Ichiou gave him a confused and disbelieving glance. _He's a tough kid. What's wrong with him? He must be totally out of his mind._

"Yes, I understand that. And don't worry, I won't let any harm befall her as long as you're behaving yourself and continues to do as I say. You are dismissed." Without further delay, Kaname stood up and rushed out the door in a hurry.

He had fought with himself to not give away his overwhelming disgust and fright and was pretty satisfied with himself actually. However, he didn't really have time to feel happy for himself, because the moment that there was a locked door between him and the rest of the world, he turned into a tight, little ball of sobbing misery. He couldn't understand why he was made to do that and he didn't understand why he didn't fight it more than he did. Deep down, he knew it was because he was afraid Ichiou would punish him for that by hurting Yuki, but in his own eyes, it just added up with the rest of his guilt.

_I can't stay here. He will want me to do it again and again. I can't stand the thought. I'm going to run away. But where? What's going to happen to me? Where am I going to live? Who's going to take care of me? What do I do? Who do I have left?_

_Cross! Cross will help me. But I can never tell him why I have to get away. And everyone would come to destroy us because they would think it strange. B-but… He has a boarding school! And he'd talked with me about opening a class for vampires!_

Kaname's hand went directly for his telephone, typing in the house number he was so familiar with already. He was still shaking so badly that he typed wrong a few times and had to start over. He finally got it right and it only rang twice before he heard the ex-hunter's voice in the other end. Kaname couldn't keep the trembles out of his voice. He was still horribly frightened. "Cross? It's K-Kaname. You have to help me…"

THE END


End file.
